제가 써본 사랑시(영시)입니다. 어떤가요?

Question

Darling, spring flowers are in bloom.

I love you.

​

Darling, the summer fruits are fresh.

I love you.

​

Darling, autumn leaves are beautiful.

I love you.

​

Darling, there's a lot of snow outside the window.

I love you.

​

​

Even if the seasons change,

My heart doesn't change.

​

I'll love you forever.

​

​

​

[번역]

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달링, 봄 꽃이 피었어.

사랑해.

​

달링, 여름 과일이 싱싱해.

사랑해.

​

달링, 가을 낙엽이 아름다워.

사랑해.

​

달링, 창밖에 눈이 가득 쌓였어.

사랑해.

​

​

​

계절이 바뀌어도,

내 마음은 변하지 않아.

영원히 사랑해.

Answer 1

안녕하세요. 손용준 전문가입니다. 봄, 여름, 가을, 겨울 계절을 담아 잘 쓰셨네요. 하지만 약간은 단조로운 것 같아 제가 조금 수정 해 봤습니다. 참고 바랍니다. 감사합니다.

Darling, spring flowers are in bloom. I love you like a spring breeze.

Darling, the summer fruits are crisp. I like to feel you you with all my passion.

Darling, the autumn leaves are beautiful. I like to touch you like autumn breeze.

Darling, there's a lot of snow outside the window. I like to protect you, no matter how severe the ordeal.

Even if the seasons change,

My heart doesn't change.

I love you forever.